Funny Valentine's Day Quotes

Calvin: What's it like to fall in love?
Hobbes: Well... say the object of your affection walks by...
Calvin: Yeah?
Hobbes: First, your heart falls into your stomach and splashes your innards. All the moisture makes you sweat profusely. This condensation shorts the circuits to your brain and you get all woozy. When your brain burns out altogether, your mouth disengages and you babble like a cretin until she leaves.
Calvin: That's LOVE?!?
Hobbes: Medically speaking.
Calvin: Heck, that happened to me once, but I figured it was cooties!!

The idea of falling in love cannot get any cuter than this. This Valentine's day, surrender to that inexplicable feeling of happiness. Expressing your love to the person you've been patiently waiting for, seems like a daunting task. Funny Valentine's day quotes is a way to help you out with this daunting task. So read on for some of the funny Valentine's day quotes and make a move to sweep your beloved off their feet!

Valentine's Day Funny Quotes

Valentine's Day is when a lot of married men are reminded what a poor shot Cupid really is. ~ Unknown

I wanted to make it really special on Valentine's Day, so I tied my boyfriend up. And for three solid hours I watched whatever I wanted on TV. ~ Tracy Smith

Today is Valentine's Day. Or, as men like to call it, Extortion day. ~ Jay Leno

All you need is love. But a little chocolate now and then doesn't hurt. ~ Charles M. Schulz

No matter how love sick a woman is, she shouldn't take the first pill that comes along.~ Joyce Brothers

Falling in love is so hard on the knees. ~ Aerosmith

Give me a thousand kisses, then a hundred, then a thousand more. ~ Catullus

Anyone can be passionate, but it takes real lovers to be silly. ~ Rose Franken

True love comes quietly, without banners or flashing lights. If you hear bells, get your ears checked. ~ Erich Segal

Valentine's Day Quotes from Movies

If I tell you I love you, can I have you forever? ~ Casper

Even though this is clearly impossible, it's amazing. ~ The Lake House

It was a perfect blend of poetry and meanness. ~ You've Got Mail

Love is a leap ... I was never inspired to jump. ~ Kate & Leopold

The best love is the kind that awakens the soul and makes us reach for more; that plants a fire in our hearts and brings peace to our minds. ~ Notebook

Remember my sentimental friend, you will be judged not by how much you love, but by how much you are loved. ~ Wizard of Oz

Look, I guarantee there'll be tough times. I guarantee that at some time, one or both of us is gonna want to get out of this thing. But I also guarantee that if I don't ask you to be mine, I'll regret it for the rest of my life, because I know, in my heart, you're the only one for me. ~ Runaway Bride

Quotes About Being Single

Being single isn't bad. What is bad is giving up hope on finding that someone special. ~ Unknown

I'm dating a woman now who, evidently, is unaware of it. ~ Garry Shandling

Some people are settling down, some people are settling and some people refuse to settle for anything less than butterflies. ~ Sex and the City

Bisexuality immediately doubles your chances for a date on Saturday night. ~ Woody Allen

Maybe some women aren't meant to be tamed. Maybe they just need to run free till they find someone just as wild to run with them. ~ Sex and the City

I never found a companion that was so companionable as solitude. ~ Henry David Thoreau

By persistently remaining single, a man converts himself into a permanent public temptation. ~ Oscar Wilde

Read more on

• Being Single Quotes
• How to Enjoy Being Single

Cute Valentines Day Quotes

If I could reach up and hold a star for every time you've made me smile, the entire evening sky would be in the palm of my hand. ~ Unknown

Love is like playing the piano. First you must learn to play by the rules, then you must forget the rules and play from your heart." ~ Unknown

You don't marry someone you can live with - you marry the person who you cannot live without. ~ Unknown

True love is like ghosts, which everybody talks about and few have seen. ~ La Rochefoucauld

Better to have loved and lost, than to have never loved at all. ~ St. Augustine

Love cures people - both the ones who give it and the ones who receive it. ~ Dr. Karl Menninger

Some love lasts a lifetime. True love lasts forever. ~ Unknown

Within you, I lose myself. Without you, I find myself wanting to be lost again. ~ Unknown

Valentine's day quotes for singles are the motivating words to help you believe in the idea of love. If the instinctive attraction has lasted for far too long, today is the day to do something about it. The picture may seem fuzzy, but it's never going to get clear if you don't want it to. So, buckle up and put all the motivation into action!