Funny Random Things to Say

★ Some Funny Random Facts ★
★ Rubber bands last longer when they are refrigerated.

★ There are 158 verses in the national anthem of Greece and no one's ever memorized them.

★ There are more chickens than people in the world.

★ 'Screeched' is the longest monosyllabic word in English.

★ All 50 US states are listed on the back of the $5 dollar bill on top of the Lincoln Memorial.

★ Peanuts are used in making dynamites.

★ The ostrich's eye is bigger than its brain.

★ A dragonfly has a lifespan of 24 hours.

★ A goldfish has a memory of 5 seconds.

★ You cannot sneeze with your eyes open.

★ Really Funny Random Thoughts ★
★ Why isn't phonetic spelled the way it sounds?

★ Why are cigarettes sold in gas stations when smoking is actually prohibited there?

★ Why doesn't 'onomatopoeia' sound like what it is?

★ You never know when it will strike, but there comes a moment at work when you've made up your mind that you just aren't doing anything productive for the rest of the day.

★ I wish I could say I am not going to write anymore.

★ Why are they called 'stands' when they're made for sitting?

★ The letters T and G are very close to each other on a keyboard. This recently became all too apparent to me and consequently I will never be ending a work email with the phrase 'Regards' again.

★ Do you remember when you were a kid playing Nintendo and it wouldn't work? You take the cartridge out, blow in it and that would magically fix the problem. Every kid did that, but how did we all know how to fix the problem? There were no Internet or message boards or FAQ's. We just figured it out - moral of the story is today's kids are soft.

★ Was learning cursive really necessary?

★ How many times am I allowed to ask 'what', before I say 'sorry I didn't get you', when I don't want to in the first place?

★ Is it okay to believe in soap operas?

★ LOL has gone from meaning, "laugh out loud" to "I have nothing else to say"

★ Funny Things To Say To Friends ★
★ I think part of a best friend's job should be to immediately clear your computer history if you die.

★ If you want to receive updates about my upcoming events, then please give me money so that I can buy a phone and a computer.

★ Whenever someone says "I'm not book smart, but I'm street smart", all I hear is "I'm not real smart, but I'm imaginary smart".

★ I love the sense of camaraderie when an entire line of cars teams up to prevent an idiot from cutting in at the front. Stay strong, brothers!

★ If I tried to look as good looking as all the celebrities I find attractive, I would look just about as ugly as I really am.

★ I heard beer helps reduce a hangover, can I have some?

★ If only the world ran out of fuel, humans would have enough biogas to make 'The Jetsons' come true! Bummer!

★ When the going gets tough, the tough get going, so why don't you just leave!