Forwarded Messages
A rant, not technically a story, but my sister thought it was comedic, so I'm posting it on here. Why not? Oh, and, uh- comments make me smile! :-) lol.
This is so agitating.
More agitating than the time I hid from Mr. S in the grocery store and then he told the entire class about it the next day during social studies.
More agitating than the stupid "fashion industry" here in the U.S. trying to bring back cowboy boots, while I've been wearing the authentic ones my entire life, getting ridiculed for it. More agitating than my sister's emotionally abusive boyfriend, SNick (okay, maybe not that bad).
More agitating than the time at that one school dance where some random sicko (probably drunk) 6th grader came up behind me and slapped my butt. (I mean, come on... he could've at LEAST slapped a bigger butt... I'm lacking, as the genetic pool decided for me, in the Cushions Department.)
No, really. This is a pain.
A pain called... forwarded emails.
Millions of them, taking up space on my computer.
I guess that's what I get for going away for a month.
...
"if you don't send this to ten people in ten minutes, you'll be haunted for ten years." (uh huh)
..."if you don't send this to all of your friends, including me, everyone will think you don't care." (okay, honey.)
..."if you don't send this to 1,000 people in two milliseconds, you'll never be in love." (been there, done that.)
..."if you don't send this, if you don't do that," (Why are you telling me what to do?? You're just a stupid forward, written originally by some college-drop out, flame-commenting, lifeless middle aged man who was rejected by all the publishing companies, so he's resorting to taking out his frustrations with his life by creating a chain email to start sending around, just so he can annoy people like me.)
"I didn't believe it, either... but then I sent it to 100 people, and I married the love of my life!" (yeah, and I bet she's growing a beard and sitting on the couch eating bon bons while watching reruns of the Anna Nicole Smith show, as you sit at your Dell and formulate your chain emails!)
**Now make a wish** (what if I don't want to?)
and scroll down
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Keep scrolling
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"If you don't send this to 50 people in 2 minutes, you'll have bad luck in love." (What?!? All that scrolling and I don't even get a cookie?! I have to FORWARD this to people instead?! Wish, smish! I'm out of here!)
Come join Lauren in her Fight Against Forwards- come and join the FAF!
More agitating than the time I hid from Mr. S in the grocery store and then he told the entire class about it the next day during social studies.
More agitating than the stupid "fashion industry" here in the U.S. trying to bring back cowboy boots, while I've been wearing the authentic ones my entire life, getting ridiculed for it. More agitating than my sister's emotionally abusive boyfriend, SNick (okay, maybe not that bad).
More agitating than the time at that one school dance where some random sicko (probably drunk) 6th grader came up behind me and slapped my butt. (I mean, come on... he could've at LEAST slapped a bigger butt... I'm lacking, as the genetic pool decided for me, in the Cushions Department.)
No, really. This is a pain.
A pain called... forwarded emails.
Millions of them, taking up space on my computer.
I guess that's what I get for going away for a month.
...
"if you don't send this to ten people in ten minutes, you'll be haunted for ten years." (uh huh)
..."if you don't send this to all of your friends, including me, everyone will think you don't care." (okay, honey.)
..."if you don't send this to 1,000 people in two milliseconds, you'll never be in love." (been there, done that.)
..."if you don't send this, if you don't do that," (Why are you telling me what to do?? You're just a stupid forward, written originally by some college-drop out, flame-commenting, lifeless middle aged man who was rejected by all the publishing companies, so he's resorting to taking out his frustrations with his life by creating a chain email to start sending around, just so he can annoy people like me.)
"I didn't believe it, either... but then I sent it to 100 people, and I married the love of my life!" (yeah, and I bet she's growing a beard and sitting on the couch eating bon bons while watching reruns of the Anna Nicole Smith show, as you sit at your Dell and formulate your chain emails!)
**Now make a wish** (what if I don't want to?)
and scroll down
*
*
*
*
*
*
*
* * *
*
*
*
*
*
*
*
*
*
Keep scrolling
*
*
*
*
*
*
*
*
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"If you don't send this to 50 people in 2 minutes, you'll have bad luck in love." (What?!? All that scrolling and I don't even get a cookie?! I have to FORWARD this to people instead?! Wish, smish! I'm out of here!)
Come join Lauren in her Fight Against Forwards- come and join the FAF!
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