Effects of Peer Pressure

Dressed in her denim skirt, and petite pink t-shirt, Sarah almost felt as if she was hiding herself behind the layers of make-up that she dabbed before coming to school. She remembered the first time she stepped into high school. High school was a nightmare for Sarah when she was ridiculed for her dull dressing sense, her messed up hairdo and her geeky spectacles. She was sick and tired of kids laughing at her and looking at her as if she had walked out straight from another planet. She was sick of having lunch alone, and leading a non-existent profile in high-school until she decided it was time for her to join the bandwagon. She started dressing up like the Barbie dolls in her class, even picked up a few make up tips from them. She was listening to the same music that everyone was listening to, she was going to the places that everyone frequented and even though she hated it, she tried to gulp down a glass of beer at every weekend party that she attended. Soon she was what her peers wanted her to be – one of the lot.

We’ve heard about it, experienced it, advised the children about it and yet, a majority of kids continue to struggle with it through years of schooling and perhaps even later. Peer pressure is inevitable since there always exists one ‘cool group’ at school – which basically includes a bunch of kids who do all the things that they are not supposed to do and make it seem like a ‘cool’ or ‘happening’ thing to do. Children, who are too sincere at studies, have often been at the receiving end of ridicule, and a lot of meaningless bashing by the bullies at school. Indulging in unsafe sexual practices, alcohol, drug abuse, eating disorders and smoking are some of the activities that are a part of the peer pressure phenomenon.

Often you find teenaged children indulging in unprotected sex with multiple partners just because they think everyone is doing it and hence it is ‘cool’. The parameters of good and bad have been replaced by ‘what’s in’ and ‘what’s out’. Peer pressure is nothing but the incessant desire of the children to be perceived as ‘happening’ and ‘cool’ in order to belong to a particular group. Often at schools and colleges the students are always forming groups, and there is a lot of group politics and bullying than you can ever imagine.

For parents who want to guide their children on dealing with peer pressure, the answer lies in simple and effective parenting. Always tell your child that he/she is a unique individual and does not have to emulate his/her peers to feel accepted by them. Peer pressure is something that children deal from the early schooling years and can even continue facing the problem during adulthood. Although the severity of peer pressure might not seem very grave in every situation, never take any sort of peer pressure lightly. No matter what form it comes in, peer pressure erodes the individuality of the child and retards personal growth.

Peer pressure kills individuality and gives rise to a set of people who are merely clones of each other. Often what people don’t realize is that although there exists the garb of a similar fashion or a similar trend that masks these clones, the actual faces behind these facades are unique. Loss of individuality can be the biggest setback anyone can suffer in his or her childhood. It is very important for children themselves to realize that it is never about fitting in a set mould of characters and skills, it is about being a part of the group and yet retaining your individuality – be it your clothes, your friends, or your thoughts.

Be it school, college or workplace - making friends is important, and so is socializing, but there are ways to forge new ties and mix up with people without being pressurized by the peers. Friends never make you lose your identity, making friends is about appreciating the differences and respecting individual tastes and still being together. So remember that if someone asks you to change yourself and be like them in order to be accepted - you are better off without them. Be comfortable with who you are, and you will soon make new friends and will be accepted by everyone. The effects of peer pressure can be prevented by teaching your children to be confident and comfortable in their own skin.