Duplicity The Disease of the Century
Duplicity from politics to private life and its destructive effects on our personalities but most importantly, how to escape all masks. See more.
Looking around you can quickly come to a conclusion: most people are driven by their interests and as long as the goals are achieved, the means don't matter that much...if in many occasions at all.
This is the wheal that turns the disease of duplicity. If one party has greater power...migration will occur and the old opponents become friends, on the same side of the barricade because...that's now for their best interest. So what if another party will come to power tomorrow? They go where the power is, no problem.
In politics corruption and lack of scruples is at home in many countries of the world and it odds are that to some extent or another it is present in all political systems. However, this duplicity is not necessarily a political or environmental product. It is present there and we see it every day yet...duplicity starts a lot earlier.
Duplicity starts early.
As a teacher of mine was saying "no school in the world can build integrity within its students". The personal level of duplicity is the most painful one, the most obvious - everyone sees it but the one in question.
The causes of this duplicity in character can be of multiple sources but one important factor that transforms our lives in good or bad is the very example of our parents. If you did not see integrity in your family, if you were constantly exposed to duplicity, this will simply become a way of life, without you even realizing it much, or acknowledge it to the extent it has to be acknowledged, because this is the only thing you have seen! This is what you have been fed.
As adults of course we have the choice and responsibility to check ourselves and see where the numerous masks of duplicity can lead. Some people have a few masks, but other have so many of them that you wonder if you'll ever get to the true face of the individual.
This becomes very painful when you genuinely care for the person, maybe it is the case of your husband or your wife and this can become quite a challenge.
Understanding the sources.
Before judging and labeling a person as "suffering from duplicity", it is very important to know that these kinds of people are usually people who have been badly hurt and they are afraid to show their real self for fear that they might not be good enough, they might be rejected again or mocked at. Duplicity is a product of rejection suffered throughout life and the desire to act like people you might admire for the right reasons, yet, admiring them and trying to copy their behavior, you lose your own personality in the process.
Regardless of the reasons behind a person's "multiple masks" behavior, an adult who chooses to be whom he simply is not (I don't include here trying to become better in your field or the normal desires to become a better person, a more capable and reliable one) will eventually have to carry all these masks around everywhere he/she goes. Oh they can become heavy at times!
Have you not noticed that it is exactly those people who want to seem perfect, when they do silly things, they try so bad to find an excuse that the situation becomes even more ridiculous than what it looked like in the first place. For these people, the "perfect" image has become an idol and they don't realize that all grownups know that there is no such thing like "Mr. or Mrs. Perfect". Of course we are all perfectible and we should want to achieve it but, we need to be realistic enough to know that carrying around all these masks of perfection is wearisome and will ultimately lead to an implosion of the bearer.
I heard someone once describing how in the middle of screaming and shouting at her spouse, a woman heard the phone ringing. She went to pick it up and with the warmest and sweetest voice on earth she said:"Hello?"
Another mask that wants to show "I'm always in control". Lying and denying are the next steps where the masks are taking a person. But who are we lying to after all? Whom can we deceive? We deceive ourselves first of all. It is like stealing from our own garden. Yes, we steal a lot and unfortunately not only from ourselves alone but from our children too infecting thus the next generation.
But how can one get rid of the masks?
To get rid of the masks must first come as a decision from the inside, a decision from the heart. No amount of pressure will get them off you if you don't came to the conclusion that getting them out of your life is the best thing to do, for your health and for the next generation.
"Oh but they'll see the real me!" you might say. So what? Thank God they finally get to see the real you! You are unique and precious because God created you so! It is normal to find it difficult, that's why, simply ask God to give you His help in this (because it might take a while) and heal all the wounds (of rejection) you have accumulated in your heart so far, just as you want God to forgive all your sins. You might need to check if you've forgiven all those who rejected you one way or another. That is very important for your inner healing. Jesus Christ, the Son of God Himself wants to restore your soul and to give you a new, genuine joy, and a great story to tell! The story of the true you! Be blessed!
This is the wheal that turns the disease of duplicity. If one party has greater power...migration will occur and the old opponents become friends, on the same side of the barricade because...that's now for their best interest. So what if another party will come to power tomorrow? They go where the power is, no problem.
In politics corruption and lack of scruples is at home in many countries of the world and it odds are that to some extent or another it is present in all political systems. However, this duplicity is not necessarily a political or environmental product. It is present there and we see it every day yet...duplicity starts a lot earlier.
Duplicity starts early.
As a teacher of mine was saying "no school in the world can build integrity within its students". The personal level of duplicity is the most painful one, the most obvious - everyone sees it but the one in question.
The causes of this duplicity in character can be of multiple sources but one important factor that transforms our lives in good or bad is the very example of our parents. If you did not see integrity in your family, if you were constantly exposed to duplicity, this will simply become a way of life, without you even realizing it much, or acknowledge it to the extent it has to be acknowledged, because this is the only thing you have seen! This is what you have been fed.
As adults of course we have the choice and responsibility to check ourselves and see where the numerous masks of duplicity can lead. Some people have a few masks, but other have so many of them that you wonder if you'll ever get to the true face of the individual.
This becomes very painful when you genuinely care for the person, maybe it is the case of your husband or your wife and this can become quite a challenge.
Understanding the sources.
Before judging and labeling a person as "suffering from duplicity", it is very important to know that these kinds of people are usually people who have been badly hurt and they are afraid to show their real self for fear that they might not be good enough, they might be rejected again or mocked at. Duplicity is a product of rejection suffered throughout life and the desire to act like people you might admire for the right reasons, yet, admiring them and trying to copy their behavior, you lose your own personality in the process.
Regardless of the reasons behind a person's "multiple masks" behavior, an adult who chooses to be whom he simply is not (I don't include here trying to become better in your field or the normal desires to become a better person, a more capable and reliable one) will eventually have to carry all these masks around everywhere he/she goes. Oh they can become heavy at times!
Have you not noticed that it is exactly those people who want to seem perfect, when they do silly things, they try so bad to find an excuse that the situation becomes even more ridiculous than what it looked like in the first place. For these people, the "perfect" image has become an idol and they don't realize that all grownups know that there is no such thing like "Mr. or Mrs. Perfect". Of course we are all perfectible and we should want to achieve it but, we need to be realistic enough to know that carrying around all these masks of perfection is wearisome and will ultimately lead to an implosion of the bearer.
I heard someone once describing how in the middle of screaming and shouting at her spouse, a woman heard the phone ringing. She went to pick it up and with the warmest and sweetest voice on earth she said:"Hello?"
Another mask that wants to show "I'm always in control". Lying and denying are the next steps where the masks are taking a person. But who are we lying to after all? Whom can we deceive? We deceive ourselves first of all. It is like stealing from our own garden. Yes, we steal a lot and unfortunately not only from ourselves alone but from our children too infecting thus the next generation.
But how can one get rid of the masks?
To get rid of the masks must first come as a decision from the inside, a decision from the heart. No amount of pressure will get them off you if you don't came to the conclusion that getting them out of your life is the best thing to do, for your health and for the next generation.
"Oh but they'll see the real me!" you might say. So what? Thank God they finally get to see the real you! You are unique and precious because God created you so! It is normal to find it difficult, that's why, simply ask God to give you His help in this (because it might take a while) and heal all the wounds (of rejection) you have accumulated in your heart so far, just as you want God to forgive all your sins. You might need to check if you've forgiven all those who rejected you one way or another. That is very important for your inner healing. Jesus Christ, the Son of God Himself wants to restore your soul and to give you a new, genuine joy, and a great story to tell! The story of the true you! Be blessed!
Like This Article?
Follow:
Post Comment