Death Hurts

It hurt, Death. I remember my last thoughts before I poured the liquid and set it aflame. I remember the feel of my flesh being burned. I remembered I screamed, I cried, I begged for it stop. I didn't want it to really stop. I'm happy I did it. I didn't deserve to breathe earth's air. I'm better off dead. Better off up here. Waiting....Listening....Never fully living but not fully dead. I miss my family and I miss my friends. When I died I thought people would overlook it. Like a lighting strike, it takes your attention then it's gone. It's like the wind it's there, and then it's not. I miss my life, my friends and my family. I'm not in heaven and I'm not in hell. I'm stuck in between. I can observe the people on earth and see the events that will unfold in front of them. I have no feelings. I have no heart. I don't even have to breathe. I do it because it's normal. But I'm not normal anymore. Committing suicide was the worst thing that I did in my life. It hurt, Death. Never listen to that whispering voice. His name was Satin and he had me.