Dating for the scared and lonely: part 1.

The truth is most articles are written now days for people who already no what they are doing and don’t actually help the ones that really need it. I’m talking about the people out there who have actually had no dates what so ever and really truly need help. They probably don’t know where to go to get help themselves. I do feel sorry for the people who are legitimately scared of the opposite sex. And believe me most people are to some respect. It does not have to be this way so I’ve come up with some tips to get your head above water so you can stay alive in the dating game.

First thing to know that you probably already do know is that the dating game is rough business and you can get hurt easily if you are not prepared.

Step one if you’re the kind of person who has fragile feelings and gets hurt easily it high time to work on this. Luckily it can be fixed but it will take time and hard work. This fragility has arisen over time and there is not quick fix formula that will help. Talk to people about how you are feeling and you will find that they are in the same situation or have felt what you are feeling and will be able to help. Lift your head up and look people in the eyes when you are talking to someone and you will find that they are not as confident as you thought or perceived them to be. Now this is a huge subject this perception of confidence because the fact is, is that you are or have most likely made up negative thoughts in your head about how weak you are and how strong he/she are.

Why humans automatically jump straight to this assumption about people I don’t know but I do know that many people do it. These negative thoughts have been building up inside you for a long time now and have probably almost become a part of who you are? Like you rely on them to validate yourself and get through the day?

Without getting rid of such negative thoughts there is very little chance for a successful dating experience. The reason why is you will never be able to come across as accepting yourself and being confident as you are always internally putting yourself down. The opposite sex whether they are male or female can sense this in you even though you are trying your hardest to suppress it.

The first step in eliminating these negative thoughts is again talking to people about it. Spend some time in finding out what really triggers these thoughts and then replace them with a positive thought. Do this so that each negative thought has a corresponding positive thought and every time that thought comes up you dismiss it by recalling your new confident self. This will take time as the negative thoughts are well etched into your characteristics but they will eventually disappear the more you try to substitute those bad thoughts away with good thoughts about what a great person you are.

Always remember that people will put you down but it is up to whether you accept that as the truth or dispel it immediately. Because in the end it is only you who really gets hurt in the long run.

Know more about how the modern dating scene will affect your life.

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