Communication Techniques to Avoid Conflict

We can have conflicts with our significant-other, friends, relatives, co-workers etc. But the presence of conflict doesn't necessarily imply that the relationship is doomed. In fact, conflict helps people to vent out their muted feelings, allowing them to release their suppressed emotions. However, as all of us would have experienced, we get into a very aggressive mode when someone has a go at us. Ego and anger come into play and we end up saying or doing things which have got no relation whatsoever with the problem at hand. Therefore, it is important that we try to contain a conflict so that it doesn't snowball into something which can be catastrophic for us and the other party in concern. There are various methods through which we can avoid conflict, let us take a look.

Avoiding Conflict Through Effective Communication

1. Segregate the problem
It has been often seen that during the course of an argument, things get so heated up that we end up saying things which have no relevance with the real issue. Remarks get personal, and offensive language is used to ensure that we gain an edge over the other person. But, if we look at it pragmatically, shooting off one's mouth complicates the issue and the whole situation goes into a completely different tangent. Therefore, it is essential that we segregate the root-cause of the problem and build our discussion around it. This ensures that there are no off-the-cuff remarks and the situation moves in a positive direction.

2. Give respect to the point of view of others
This is easier said than done, because as humans, we have a natural tendency to look at every circumstance from our point of view. We think that we are in the right and if something is not working out, it surely must be someone else's fault. But, if you aim to resolve a conflict, it is essential that you show some respect and etiquette and allow the other party to express themselves. Using statements like, "I understand your concern on this" or "I know you are right at your end", would make the other person feel more appreciated, apart from helping in calming some jaded nerves.

3. Find more than one solution
People trying to resolve a conflict often face the prospect of the discussion resulting into a stalemate. When you are adamant and stubborn, and won't settle in for anything less than what you have proposed, it is very unlikely that you will reach a solution. Conflicts can easily be evaded if we are open to different ideas. When you have developed numerous solutions to a problem, it becomes more flexible for the parties in conflict to settle in for something they wish. Of course, each party needs to make a bit of compromise, but as long as both the parties are in a win-win situation, the conflict can be avoided.

4. Shed prejudices and perceptions
Your effort to resolve a dispute would bear no returns if you are not earnest with your effort. A lot of people simply aren't able to convince others during a conflict because they are not sure whether doing it is worth the effort. In the back of their minds, they have a bloated and stubborn image of others and this prevents them from resolving an issue. It is advisable to leave all your emotional baggage aside and put in an effort to communicate with the other person effectively.

The tips mentioned above are generalized, but, these definitely hold true for a majority of the situations. However, we don't rule out the possibility that there are some people out there who always want to create some sort of trouble for others. You can tell them from others, and putting in an effort to resolve a conflict with them may just not be a wise idea. The best way to deal with these people is to ignore them. As someone has famously said, "You should never wrestle with a pig, you both get dirty and only the pig likes it".