Colloquialisms...part II
The first seemed to be received well; no one has poisoned my coffee. Here is part 2.
In and out like a fiddler's elbow
Up and down like a bride's nightie
Shivering like a dog sh*tting razor blades
You're so green if I stuck you in the ground you'd grow...
As ugly as an unwiped a*shole...
Rainin' like a cow pissin' on a flat rock
Make you wanna slap your Granny.
Shaking like a dog passing peach seeds
You look like the syphilitic afterbirth of a Lower Slobovian gang bang
It ain't what you want, but what you get that makes you fat
If brains were gasoline, yours wouldn’t be enough to make a piss ant’s go cart go around the inside of a Cherrio.
Balancing your brain on a razor blade would be like bouncing a bb down a four lane highway.
You’re about as bright as a burnt out lantern, covered in tar, buried in the storm cellar of a coal mine.
Ugly enough to knock a buzzard off a sh*t wagon.
Ugly enough to scare a buzzard off a meat wagon.
Ugly enough to scare a pit bull up a plate glass window ("win-der").
Ugly as the south end of a northbound dog.
Hotter than two rats f*ckin' in a wool sock.
Too dumb to pour piss out of a boot with instructions written on the heel.
Hotter than a fresh f*cked fox in a forest fire.
Slicker'n snot on a doorknob (owlsh*t through a tin horn)
Nervous as a whore in church.
Off like a prom dress.
Stupid as a fried popsicle
Crazy as a soup sandwich.
...that's like pissin' up a rope
As useful as extra t*ts on a warthog.
Goin' up and down like a whore's panties
Shut up tighter'n a bull's ass in fly season.
Couldn't hit a bull's ass with a bass fiddle.
Lower than a well digger's ass (as in I'm feeling . . . )
Nutty as a squirrel turd
Happier than a dog with two d*cks
Sweatin' like a whore in church
Nervous as a long tale cat in a room full of rocking chairs
Dumber than a sack of hammers
Useful as tits on a bull
Busier than a one legged man in an ass kicking contest
Went through here like fat through a goose
Bleeding like a stuck pig
Drunk as Cooter Brown
Up and down like a bride's nightie
Shivering like a dog sh*tting razor blades
You're so green if I stuck you in the ground you'd grow...
As ugly as an unwiped a*shole...
Rainin' like a cow pissin' on a flat rock
Make you wanna slap your Granny.
Shaking like a dog passing peach seeds
You look like the syphilitic afterbirth of a Lower Slobovian gang bang
It ain't what you want, but what you get that makes you fat
If brains were gasoline, yours wouldn’t be enough to make a piss ant’s go cart go around the inside of a Cherrio.
Balancing your brain on a razor blade would be like bouncing a bb down a four lane highway.
You’re about as bright as a burnt out lantern, covered in tar, buried in the storm cellar of a coal mine.
Ugly enough to knock a buzzard off a sh*t wagon.
Ugly enough to scare a buzzard off a meat wagon.
Ugly enough to scare a pit bull up a plate glass window ("win-der").
Ugly as the south end of a northbound dog.
Hotter than two rats f*ckin' in a wool sock.
Too dumb to pour piss out of a boot with instructions written on the heel.
Hotter than a fresh f*cked fox in a forest fire.
Slicker'n snot on a doorknob (owlsh*t through a tin horn)
Nervous as a whore in church.
Off like a prom dress.
Stupid as a fried popsicle
Crazy as a soup sandwich.
...that's like pissin' up a rope
As useful as extra t*ts on a warthog.
Goin' up and down like a whore's panties
Shut up tighter'n a bull's ass in fly season.
Couldn't hit a bull's ass with a bass fiddle.
Lower than a well digger's ass (as in I'm feeling . . . )
Nutty as a squirrel turd
Happier than a dog with two d*cks
Sweatin' like a whore in church
Nervous as a long tale cat in a room full of rocking chairs
Dumber than a sack of hammers
Useful as tits on a bull
Busier than a one legged man in an ass kicking contest
Went through here like fat through a goose
Bleeding like a stuck pig
Drunk as Cooter Brown
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