Carry On, Chapter III

After having sex with Alexander, I couldn't believe what had happened. He was staring at me as confused as I was. We were both almost naked, without saying a word I started to pick up my clothes, so did Alexander.

-Alyson...-

-No, Alexander, don't say a thing. This was a mistake, I know, against your rules-

-No, I understand now that sometimes we can't just help it...-

-You couldn't help it with me, you mean. Alexander...-

-Yes?-

-I love Joseph! I don't know what just happened here, but I have to go... this was a mistake-

I finished picking up my things and I walked out from that comfy room we were. Alexander didn't say a word, mine had already hurt him enough.

That night I went to Joseph's room. I knocked at his door three times, before he opened it half asleep.

-Take me- I said looking at him straight in the eye.

-What?-

-Take me, Joseph, please, just fucking take me!- I said surprise at my first time using a "bad word".

Joseph gave me one of his malicious smiles and took me to his bed, surprisingly in a room shared by three other classmates of his, I was not the only girl, and our bed noises were not the only ones that could be overheard by the others.

Next few days Joseph and I couldn't stop doing it any time we had the chance, sex was good, different in some way to my experience with Alexander. Though with that I don't want to imply better. I don't know what went through me then, but whenever I was with Joseph and we'd come across Alexander, I couldn't help to feel up Joseph as much as I could.

In the classroom I couldn't help but thinking of Alexander, I couldn't help thinking of him all the time, except when I was with Joseph and his evil smile and his gorgeous sparkling eyes.

-Alyson, what's your problem with Alexander?- Anne asked while doing some assignment.

-What do you mean?-

-What do I mean? You've been awful to Alexander, he's bossy and amazingly stubborn but everyone could see he's into you, and yet you don't mind doing a lot of things with Joseph, in front of Alexander, are you trying to make him jealous?-

-Well, he didn't seem to care-

-Well, he looks hurt most of the time, not lately though-

-Alexander has better things to think of, he has other priorities, anyone could see that, he's always wandering around, trying to discover the piece lacking of this whole puzzle. He's so annoying, I hate Alexander, if he suffers, good.-

-What has he done to you?-

-Stare at me like a puppy, I don't know, he's annoying. And I'm busy here, I don't want to waste my time talking about him, there's nothing to talk about...-

-Except that you hate him without any good reason-

-That's lame, I just don't like him, he's creepy-

-Yeah, well, he's also very good looking-

-He's 13!-

-Soon 14-

-And us 16!-

The ring bell, that announced our class was over, rang. We picked up our books and left, ignoring the holograms that once we had learnt to respect. Though part of us knew that without them we'd be lost. I made my way to our park, I laid under my favorite tree, the one Joseph had drawn on "Joseph (heart) Alyson." I started to think about Alexander again, and that first time with him, though it was more than once, and it didn't hurt, not like when I was with Joseph for the first time that night, he was so harsh, he still was, never sweet like Alexander.

-Are you crazy?! You're gonna get a cold- Joseph smiled looking at me like if I was crazy.

-Sorry, I lost track of time-

-Sure you did, let's get in, I have my room free for two whole hours-

-Sounds great!-

-It'll be!- he said caressing my face.

After a few days there was a huge t-storm, there was way so much lightening that we thought we were in a horror movie. The power went out. For 10 minutes there was no light in both schools for the very first time since we remembered. It was a huge impact for us. Without power, we'd be dead, no machines would work, not the holograms, and for 10 minutes, we thought we'd never see those holograms again, they were part of us, all we knew, and though it was silly, we really cared for them, or what represented to be, a connection with our past, with the outside, with the grown-ups. So many good memories, the math teacher, with that mustache, the science teacher with her glasses, our history teacher, that had such a funny face, and so on.

But gladly the power came back after those long 10 minutes that seemed like an eternity for us. When it came back everyone was glad, hugging each other, thinking and saying aloud "We're alive!" It had been such a hard day that we all realized we were happy to have each other, everyone was so excited like we had never been, everyone but Alexander.

-Alexander, don't you have hugs for us?- Stephen asked.

-Not now-

-Oh c'mon! Don't be such a fun sucker!- Joseph insisted.

-I have to check everything is working properly, if you excuse me-

-What do you mean?- Charles asked.

-I have to make sure no damage has been caused by this huge storm-

We decided to not think much about it, besides, Alexander was such a paranoid. But after a few hours, after our celebrations was done, Alexander came back.

-The central heating is damaged. We won't be able to survive the winter without it. And we don't have access to it, it's not even shown in our school maps-

-Then it's time to make that phone call- Joseph.

Everyone agreed with Joseph, and escorted him to where the phone was, in the sickbay, in Alexander's room. Joseph took a deep breath and picked up the phone.

-Hello, this is Joseph, I'm a student, and our emergency is that our central heating isn't working anymore-

He hanged up the phone, and everyone cheered for him, everyone but Alexander, of course, who was lost in his thoughts again. I went to kiss Joseph, in front of everyone, see if Alexander noticed, but he didn't.

-Joseph, you are my hero. Would you mind guys in the 14th, to give some privacy to the new hero and me? I'm gonna thank him properly.-

Everyone cheered and laughed, and of course agreed. When I set my eyes again where Alexander was, he was already gone.

Days passed and nothing happened, after that weeks, and not even a call back, Joseph and other students called again, and again, once a day, later twice a day, and later, people would take turns to make that call, but there was no answer.

In the early morning was snowing when I saw Alexander covered in his winter clothes, getting ready for climbing. He had lost his mind! I approached to him.

-What are you doing?! Have you lost your mind?!-

-Shut up Alyson, if my brother finds out he'll kill me-

-So will I if you do something crazy-

-Listen, Alyson, everyone is waiting for something to happen, but I'm not like that! I'm not gonna stand here and wait. I think I know how to fix this, at least I'll try, I have an idea-

-What if something happens to you?-

-I think you'll live. It's ok to risk my life, after all, I'm the one that doesn't belong here. You are the future, many people has made great efforts for you to survive.-

-That's unfair! Alexander... Why didn't you fight for me?!- I felt something in my eyes, they were burning, tears going down my face.

-Alyson, I learnt that what happened between us is history, don't bring it back, I don't wanna talk about it. What was special for me didn't mean a thing for you. Don't try to convince me of otherwise, don't take me for a fool. You said what you had to say that day. Now if you excuse me, I have a problem to solve.-

As he started to climb, I couldn't help but to admire his courage, his capacity for not giving up. He was so nice to talk to. In that moment I wanted to say many things to make him stay, but I knew he wouldn't listen, thinking of him, I whispered "I miss you", but of course, he was already on the roofs to listen to me.

A few hours later, nobody at class had noticed Alexander had not attended any class. When we had meals either, seems like nobody missed him, everyone was too busy with their lives to care. But just when I thought nobody cared, everyone seemed to have noticed, just didn't say a word thinking Alexander had found something else better to do today, but nobody had seen him. Stephen, his brother, started to ask everyone about him. He feared he had gone to try to fix that problem himself.

-Alyson, do you know where Alexander is?-

-The dictator must be admiring something in the library, checked there?- Joseph asked in a cocky way.

-I think I may have seen someone climbing on the walls, but I thought it was just a dream!-

-I'm gonna kill him! When?!-

-Like 6 a.m in the morning-

-It's 8 p.m! Alexander!- Stephen was in such a rage, and hurt, they were family after all, something the rest of us couldn't understand well, yet we were jealous of what they had.

Stephen would do anything for his brother, and was getting ready to go after him when we felt something. We felt hot! Most of us were wearing extra clothes due to the extreme cold we were suffering and suddenly we started to feel hot with all those clothes.

-The bastard did it!- Joseph said surprised.

-That little genius!- Joseph said smiling, and with a tear going down his face.

Everyone started another celebration again, anyone could sleep alone again, and we didn't have to warm our hands with our teas anymore! Or wear tons of clothes and three pair of socks!

After an hour, Alexander came, he was dirty, but he had made it, he had a smile on his face, but it faded away as soon as he saw me, his brother hugged him and everyone congratulated him for being such a stubborn guy! He was the hero of the day.

-Stop celebrating guys, I found out something.-

-What did you discover?- Mike asked. Alexander took a deep breath.

-Seems like the schools were meant for us as a shelter not only for our time here, but once we're out of here too. I wonder why there were no more trucks of food coming here. You see, I found seeds of many type of vegetables and fruits, where the heating controls were. And also the proper tools for us to grow them. I think we are in this alone-

There was a big silence after Alexander was done with his speech, everyone walked out with their couples, except for Alexander that went alone to his place.

If something happened to us, we had no-one but ourselves, that incident had proved that. We had no-one but each other, if something happened, no-one would come to our rescue. I bet I was not the only one thinking of that that night, after sex. Even Joseph seemed to care about something that night, we didn't cross more than three words that whole night.

Next morning we went to class with a different aim, to learn as much as we could from the holograms, we couldn't take our studies lightly anymore. Our survival depended on what we could learn from them, from what the grown-ups had left us.