Building an Adult Relationship by Decreasing Shyness and Increasing Playfulness Part II

In Part I of Building an Adult Relationship by Decreasing Shyness and Increasing Playfulness, four tips for creating a better adult relationship, getting over shyness and increasing playfulness were discussed. 

Part II of this article will discuss six additional tips for decreasing shyness and increasing playfulness:

Tip #5 for a Better Adult Relationship: Learn to Play with Words
For a better adult relationship, read with your significant other and discover the beauty of language.  Discuss passages that you and your partner enjoy, memorize them, and recite them with playful expression.  Read humorous books or plays together and enjoy the subsequent stress relief that always follows a great laugh.  You will be surprised how elevating your language can literally elevate the rest of your life.  After all, wouldn’t you laugh if your spouse began quoting Shakespeare in the middle of an argument or even better, during a tender moment of romance? (Okay, maybe you wouldn’t laugh during that scenario).  At any rate, becoming playful with words and literature can help you make your adult relationship better.

Tip #6 for a Better Adult Relationship: Set Aside the Time to be Playful!
Today, it seems that everyone is telling you to set time aside for just about any thing that seems useful or important.  Trust me when I say that you should set aside time for the basics and having a good amount of play time is definitely one of the basics.  From an online article entitled Playful Communication Skills: Strengthen and Repair Relationships8, it says, "A commitment to play begins by putting aside quality time on a regular basis."

Set time aside for play everyday.  Since the kind of play that each person enjoys is definitely subjective, make sure that you simply enjoy whatever it is that you decide to do during your "play time."  Play time will improve your adult relationship with that special someone.

Tip #7 for a Better Adult Relationship: Tease with Kindness
Teasing like many actions can seem polar in nature.  What I mean to say, is that teasing can be a sign of affection and can also be hurtful.  A gentle tease spoken in a loving way can help someone relax and open a more trusting heart to those who DO recognize their weaknesses but love them regardless.  However, in many cases, teasing is NOT appropriate and can be very hurtful.  Kathleen McGowan, who wrote an interesting article9 for Psychology Today suggests several ways to tease without hurting others’ feelings.  She suggests "teas[ing] up or across your social world, not down," [being aware] of the gentler sex," and "going for absurdity, not subtlety."  When it comes to teasing, make sure it is the kind that will improve your adult relationship and not demean it.

Tip #8 for a Better Adult Relationship: Take a Vacation from Your Problems
If you have seen the movie What about Bob? then you know that taking a vacation from your problems can help you heal even lifelong woes and weaknesses.  Save up your time and take a 2-3 week vacation.  That might seem like a long time, but according to and online article author10, Richard A. Lovett, it would seem that you can reach a deeper sense of relaxation if you take more than just a weekend off.  Your adult relationship can become even more meaningful when you take time off to enjoy the sights and smells of vacation.

Tip #9 for a Better Adult Relationship: Have a Playful Hobby with One Person Who You Love
Almost any hobby can be playful as long as you enjoy it.  You can make an adult relationship better by enjoying a playful hobby together.  Whether you love to hike, build puzzles, cook, water ski or work on renovating your home you can make the process a playtime for you and your significant other. 

Tip #10 for a Better Adult Relationship: Play with Pets and with Children
According to Elizabeth Scott, writer for about.com, playing with pets, or more accurately, just being around pets has "been shown to reduce blood pressure better than medication, increase healthy lifestyle behaviors, and sometimes give better social support than humans!"11

Playing with children can also give you a renewed, and often more accurate view of life and can put our stresses into their proper perspective.  Most children don’t worry much about "time flying," where they will eat next, or how they can experience more success in the job world.  Children have a positive energy and excitement that can be contagious and help you learn to coax and encourage your playful side. Who would have thought that playing with children could better your adult relationship?
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About the Author: Marci Crane is a web content specialist for Innuity. For more information on ways that you can start your own adult relationship, please feel free to contact Heavenly Matched.
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8 http://www.helpguide.org/mental/EQ7_playful_communication.htm
9 http://psychologytoday.com/articles/pto-20060721-000005.html
10 http://www.findarticles.com/p/articles/mi_m1175/is_4_37/ai_n6184372/pg_1
11 http://stress.about.com/od/tensiontamers/tp/stressreliefkid.htm