Basis Of Choosing One’s Profession

Psychologists and counselors today have laid down a norm – which has almost become a rule – that parents should not force their aspirations on their children, because this might adversely affect the development of their basic capabilities and natural skills. Dr Ramesh Gupta believes that but for a few exceptions, for the good of the individual, family and society the parents should make use of their own experience in helping the children determine and build their careers.

A child is the product of family and the institution of marriage. As soon as a child is born, the responsibility of raising and educating it fall on the parents. Every parent wishes the child to attain the best of joys in life and bring a good name to the family. After the child has passed the tenth class exam, the question of choosing a career arises. Parents then face a difficult decision – whether the further course of education should be decided depending on the child’s interest and aptitude, or on the criteria as to which stream of education would bring the most happiness in his life.

If we give primacy to the psychological view, we find that allowing a child to choose a career on the basis of his interest and aptitude enables him to work without any stress in the field of his choice. If you support this view, you should make all efforts to enable your child to take to that stream of education and career, which suits his interest and his capability.

But some important questions do arise here: What is the purpose of human life? Should a child grow up to work according to his interest and aptitude only, far away from home and family? Or should he make a few compromises and choose a career that enables him to live with his family? In other words, does one’s joy and happiness lie in standing alone at the pinnacle of success or in leading a life together with one’s family, relatives and friends? This is dilemma that today’s psychologists and professional experts cannot answer.

If youngsters and parents first try to find answers to these questions, it would be then be easy for them to decide upon a career. It is because we gave so much importance to family that the caste system developed in the Indian tradition. It also led to the concept of the joint family and the emergence of festivals and occasions, which required the involvement of the family and the society. This is the chief reason why generally, a king’s son became a king, the farmer’s son a farmer, a doctor’s son a doctor and a politician’s son a politician. This has led to balance and harmony in our society. This is also the very reason, why in spite of all modern amenities and comforts, there is lack of social and family bonding in America and Europe. And this is also why people are rushing to India in search of peace and happiness. The West is now coming around to accept the Indian lifestyle to be very scientific and are trying to adopt the same. But regretfully, on the other hand, Indians have begun to believe that family and social ties are an ‘obstacle’ on the path to development of one’s interests and aptitude and hence are moving towards a unitary existence. And because of this, problems like disintegration of families, tension, suicides and a life devoid of principles and values are becoming quite as common in India as in the West.

Psychologists also accept that true joy is in giving rather than in receiving, is in enjoying something together rather than all alone. And for this, it is necessary that we have a big family of parents, brothers and sisters, uncles and aunts, grandmothers and grandfathers who could share our joys and sorrows. This is possible when the son chooses a profession that enables him to live and work with his father. The biggest advantage of this is that the son does not have to make any big efforts to establish his career. Along with receiving an education, he can learn a lot professionally too, while working with his father. This also proves beneficial for the father, as slowly he is able to shift the responsibility on the younger and stronger shoulders of his son, becoming freed from his family responsibilities in a natural course. There was a time when a father had five or six sons, which also gave rise to the issue of inheritance of and share in the father’s assets. But today, with educated parents preferring a single child, the adoption of the father’s profession or business by the son becomes not only practical, but also convenient.

Our ancestors were not fools to have developed the family and caste system. Indian tradition has been thriving in this very system since very early times. Even though sons followed the profession of their fathers, India has been producing great saints, scientists, actors, administrators, poets and doctors. And this system in no way impeded the growth of their unique talents.

Hence, if a person is endowed with some unique talent, the family or the society never proves a hindrance in its development. Great people like Gautam Buddha, Mahavir, Nanak, Tulsi, Aryabhatta and Osho were born in the same Indian tradition where the son follows the profession of his father. Hence, if there is no sign of any unusual talent in the child, the parents should advise him to adopt the profession of the father, so that the family tradition is continued and the family life remains smooth and undisturbed. 99 percent of children are born with ordinary talents and minds. It therefore depends on the parents how they direct their children to think and work. Psychologists too, accept the fact that the mind of a child is like clay, which is given shape by the parents, teachers and friends. Parents certainly should not try to force their aspirations on the child. Rather, they should try to guide the child to choose a career that is in the best interest of the child, the family and the society, so that he could attain not just wealth, but also peace and joy, which are the goals of human life.