About These Newfangled Stamps….

It used to be a well-known fact that nobody’s image would appear on a U.S. postage stamp until after that person had kicked the bucket; cashed in his chips; gone to the great beyond. No one was supposed to be honored with a postage stamp in the U.S. until after he or she was dead.

And then Bugs Bunny showed up on a stamp, and Goofy. And I thought: Bugs Bunny is dead? Goofy has gone through that great doggy door in the sky? When did this happen?! I didn’t know they were sick!

But it gets worse! Now, anybody can contact the U.S. Post Office via the Internet and order postage stamps with the likeness of their choice. Your own mug, staring out at your relatives and bill collectors from the upper right-hand corner of every envelope you send. Put yourself, or your kids, or your cat Fluffy on a legal U.S. stamp and send it around the world. Of course, if you have relatives who know useless information like the fact that the only people on postage stamps are supposed to be dead guys, you may have some explaining to do next time the phone rings.

"Hello? Hi, Grandma. What? No, Aunt Tildie is fine. I saw her this morning. No, Fluffy’s fine, too! He’s sitting right here on my lap. Fluffy, say…Fluffy? Fluffy! FluFFFYYYYY!"

Oh, well. At least philatelists have another category of stamp to collect—stamps created by wacky people who don’t know enough to stay off of a stamp until after they’re dead.