A Good Hairdresser

Most of us Have a Firm Idea of what makes a good hairdresser: skill, experience, a pleasing personality, enthusiasm, the ability to listen, knowledge of the latest trends, and a way with our own particular hair type. Yes, such stylists exist ­probably in your own town. You've simply got to know how to find and communicate with them.

Locating a good hairdresser

A good hairstylist is not impossible to find. You may have to search a bit, but locating a hair professional you trust and admire is very possible if you follow these suggestions:

Ask friends what salons they go to and if there are any stylists there who they think you would like. The salon your friend frequents may have the perfect hairdresser for you. Don't overlook personality when deciding on a hairdresser. We're all different - a person I feel comfortable with may scare the pants off my mother! If you see a woman whose hair you like, ask who her stylist is. If you hear good things about a stylist, book a special occasion 'do. This provides a chance to try the hairdresser without pressure to get your hair cut.

Pick a salon with a good reputation. Usually, a salon gets a good reputation for a reason: professional, talented, caring stylists. Negative reports - slow service, indifferent stylists, gossipy assistants ­can mean a negative salon experience. Schedule a consultation. When you call, remember to tell the receptionist about your hair type and what kind of looks you like. Most salons don't charge for a consultation and it is a great way to get to know a stylist before committing to an appointment.

How to communicate

The most important element in the relationship with your hairdresser is communication. True, most of us struggle to communicate with our loved ones, coworkers, and even ourselves - how can we express ourselves to someone we see just every 2 months? When it comes down to it, you don't have to do anything. Keep in mind, however, that unlike those other people in your life, your hairdresser stands over your head holding a pair of scissors. That alone is enough to get me talking. Make life easy on yourself - ask your stylist to show you exacty how to style your hair, what products are best to use, how to hold a blow-dryer, and so on. Stylists are professionals - don't be afraid to learn from them.

Start each visit by telling the stylist how the cut worked for you, how your hair is behaving, what is driving you crazy about your hair, what you might want to keep the same, and what you might want to change. If you've read anything about a new hair service or hairstyle, ask about it. If you've been seeing your hairdresser for a while, he or she probably knows what you mean by "take just a little off. If your relationship is a young one, however, you may need to physically show him or her how much you want off. If you think the stylist is taking off too much or cutting an angle too steeply, speak up immediately. Don't remain quiet and then complain when the cut is over and the hair un-fixable.

Saying good-bye

You may reach a point where the relationship with your stylist isn't working. Maybe your hairdresser is burned out and it shows in wandering attention. More commonly, however, it's you who have changed. You want to grow your hair long, but your stylist works best with short hair. Or you have decided to go back to school and can't afford your stylist's recently raised rates. Or you are simply curious and wonder what "a fresh eye" would envision on you. If you find someone new to visit, are you under any moral obligation to call your previous stylist to say you won't be coming back? I asked a few hairdressers their thoughts. The surprising answer? No. Just quietly move on. To do any more can create awkwardness. If you run into your former stylist, be pleasant, but don't dwell on why you stopped seeing her. There's no need.

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