Manchester United 0-0 Arsenal

2 min: Carrick hoists a long ball from one penalty area to the other, which Aleksandr Hleb heads clear.

1 min: Arsenal, whose players line up in their change strip of white shirts, maroony-red shorts and white socks, kick-off. They're playing into the Stretford End.

Pre-match niceties: The players limber up as Sir Alex Ferguson and Cristiano Ronaldo are presented with their Barclay's Manager of the Month and Player of the Month trophies. Hats off to them.

On Sky, pundit Ray Wilkins was talking about the difference (between the styles of play of) Cristiano Ronaldo and Wayne Rooney. "Ronaldo is easier on the eye," he said, in what is quite possible the most accurate bit of punditry I've ever heard.

What's that coming over the hill? Is it an email? Is it an email? Yes, it is. "As a Gooner I have no idea why I'm up at 7:45am to stare at what will almost surely be another entry in the Painful Humiliation folder," writes Allan Castle from, I think, Canada. "Can't they just show the 6-1 from a few years back? At least I'd know to stop watching after we go ahead. Haven't felt this pessimistic before one of these ever, I don't think. Here's hoping that means a shock 0-3 result that changes everything. Here's hoping."

As Red said in The Shawshank Redemption, Allan, hope is a dangerous thing. Having backed Tiger Woods to win the Masters before tee-off on Thursday, I've ridden a roller coaster of emotion as he's done just enough to keep the flame of hope that burns within me flickering. I know deep down that he's probably left himself too much to do, but the hope is killing me.

Right so, back to the football. Interestingly, Arsenal goalkeeper Manuel Almunia's name is conspicuous by its absence from the team-sheet. Being an informed reporter whose finger is never far from the pulse, I don't know if he's injured or suspended. For the time being I'm going to peddle the wild conspiracy theory that he's been dropped as a disciplinary measure for this interview he did with Daniel Taylor in yesterday's Guardian.

Bah! After being flayed around the course, Tragic Ohio finishes in a very creditable - and utterly useless to those of us who backed him on the nose - second place.

On a far more important note, myself and my colleagues Sean Ingle and James Dart have lumped on - well, put a couple of quid each - on Tragic Ohio in the 3.30pm at Kelso. According to Observer tipster Eddie "The Shoe" Fremantle it "looks a good thing on old form for Paul Nicholls". The bookies don't seem to agree, as we've backed it at 28-1. I don't fancy this one at all, but I felt obliged to back it after Ingle brought it to my attention. To be fair, I once had a fiver on a Fremantle nap that came in at 50-1, so stranger things have happened. To At The Races, and don't spare the, em, horses.

The teams

Man Utd: Van der Sar, Brown, Ferdinand, Pique, Evra, Ronaldo,
Carrick, Hargreaves, Scholes, Park, Rooney.Subs: Kuszczak,
Anderson, Giggs, O'Shea, Tevez.

Arsenal: Lehmann, Toure, Gallas, Song Billong, Clichy, Eboue,
Fabregas, Silva, Hleb, Van Persie, Adebayor.Subs: Djourou,
Fabianski, Bendtner, Justin Hoyte, Walcott.

Referee: Howard Webb (S Yorkshire)

Pre-match reading

"Anything might still be possibly mathematically, but were Arsenal to lift themselves after the drama and despair of Europe to take three points at old Trafford this afternoon it would count as their most miraculous achievement of the season. Actually never mind this season,. It would be a miracle of biblical proportions. And Arsene Wenger would be the new Charlton Heston," wrote Paul Wilson in this morning's Observer, saving me the job of having to say much the same thing in this afternoon's minute-by-minute report.

Meanwhile last Friday, Mr Rob Smyth took guardian.co.uk/football readers on a trip down memory lane, recalling half-a-dozen of the more exciting Arsenal v Manchester United encounters in The Joy of Six. If searing, insightful comment and nostalgia aren't your particular cup of tea, you can always sign up for the Fiver, our free, unfunny and habitually tardy football email and/or listen to our Sony Award-nominated (no, really) podcast Football Weekly instead.

And here's how it all went down in Liverpool's 3-1 win over Blackburn Rovers at Anfield.